Day 3: Understanding

December 19, 2008 at 5:01 am 1 comment

Today I flushed my phone down the toilet.

I was in our church gym, and the bathrooms there have this really powerful flush, and swoosh, there it went. I’ll never put a phone in my back pocket again.

I was afraid Michael would be mad. Instead, he laughed and said, “I know you need a new phone, but isn’t this going to extremes to get one?”

Like I would ever do that on purpose! (wink!)

His understanding of the situation is a gift to me. I appreciate that he has a sense of humor about most predicaments. I try to return the gift and give the same understanding about working late, or playing golf, or fantasy football. Those are things he has to do, or really enjoys. I understand that about him. I understand when he hangs out with Aidan and they mess up his room, it’s part of their bonding. I’m down with that.

I love it when a friend says, “That’s who you are”, or “I totally understand that about you”. It means a lot when someone really has taken the time and energy to fully comprehend what I’m all about. When conclusions are drawn, or if I’m misunderstood, that’s a friendship barrier to me.

Understanding means you have to listen. You have to really hear what someone is saying to fully understand them. It also means to think outside of your own little box, and try to understand where they’re coming from. I struggle with this. I admit, I have a hard time being the friend I should be when I don’t understand someone’s actions. I’ve prayed that God will work this out in my heart. It’s so easy for me to love people, but hard for me to understand them at the same time.

One gift (love) is good, two (love and understanding), is that much better.

Today is the tenth anniversary of the day Michael and I got engaged. We just had a conversation that was full of misunderstanding. I don’t think I fully understood what he was saying and vice versa. The love is there, but the understanding comes and goes.

But I’m still glad he asked me to marry him 10 years ago. And I hope he’s glad I said yes, even when we have difficulty understanding each other.

So listen well, and accept things that you may not agree with, and you will give the gift of understanding, possibly to someone who really needs it.


Entry filed under: Uncategorized.

Day 2: Belly Laughs Day 4: It worked for the Indians

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. Jen  |  December 19, 2008 at 2:05 pm

    That is a great observation. I think, pretty often, I only hear words. and not someone’s heart. and it is the heart behind the words that give it the true meaning that they meant to communicate. but i just don’t get it. and then i feel so misunderstood when someone assumes something wrongly about my heart. hmmmm. it is all so complicated, isn’t it?! i enjoyed your thoughts though.


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