I Will Not Turn to the Dark Side

November 18, 2009 at 9:30 pm Leave a comment

All day I’ve been dealing with being mad.

I keep replaying that scene in my head from Return of the Jedi, where Luke and Darth Vader are fighting and the Emporer is standing there, with his wrinkly raisin face saying, “Give in to your anger. Turn to the dark side.”

So far, I’m okay, I haven’t used my powers for evil.

I am the queen of keeping things in perspective. I always feel guilty for getting my mad on, because I can look at everything I’m mad about and say, “Well, at least I’m not dealing with _____”.

Then, I end up being mad at feeling guilty because I just want to feel sorry for myself for just a minute and feel like what I’m dealing with has some validity, even though I know others have it worse.

It’s vicious.

So today, since I think in lists, here’s my list o’ mad: (which doesn’t give off a very “mad” effect when you put an o’ in it.)

1. I’m mad that Michael has traveled a lot lately.
2. I’m mad that Molly is sick on her birthday, and this should be a birthday post about the most beautiful, sweet, precious child of mine who is 5 today, but instead, I’m mad.
3. I’m mad that I have to miss choir practice, then race to get to Praise Team practice. I need the choir practice tonight. The Christmas program is coming quickly!
4. I’m mad that I’m having to postpone Molly’s birthday celebration.
5. I’m mad that Michael and I are so busy and dealing with so much that we haven’t had fun in a really long time.
6. I’m mad that it’s so hard to find someone to help me out with babysitting during the week. There are times when I can’t take my kids to where I’m going, so I don’t go.
7. I’m mad, really, really mad that Paisley will not leave me alone for one minute, and when she does, she spills something.

See, it’s all stupid, trivial stuff. There’s more, but I know my limits.

So the Bible says to “be angry, but do not sin”, so my prayer is that I can keep my temper under control and not snap at all of the precious people in my world that don’t deserve it.

And I’m sure that by the end of the day, after I’ve spent time singing at Praise Team practice and get home and maybe watch our favorite stand up comics (CLEAN comedy, let me clarify) I will have forgotten about the mad and will be back to my happy self.

If not, I’ll give the Emperor a run for his money.

(and a post about my favorite birthday girl of the day is coming soon, I promise!)


Entry filed under: Uncategorized.

My Opinion, and I’ll Be Swift About It. Good Golly, Miss Molly!

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