Archive for January, 2011

Fighting with Faith

The past three days have been pretty regular. I’ve picked up the house, prepared meals, driven through the carpool line, been to Bible Study, taken Aidan to piano lessons and went to church tonight. All the same old stuff I do every single week.

But this week was different for me on the inside.

I’ve been under an attack from the one who hates me the most. The first and foremost enemy of God, whose name I won’t type on my blog because he’s so disgusting to me that I don’t think he even deserves a name. I reserve every ounce of hate that I have for him. He is the master of all evil, and the biggest liar of them all.

He is aware when I’m growing in Christ. He watches me as I fall more in love with the words of God. He knows my first love is Jesus Christ, and that I place all of my identity in him.

Even as I typed those sentences, he put the thought in my head that I sound arrogant. No I don’t. I sound redeemed. When you know Jesus, you claim him, and you claim him loudly!

He knows of a situation this week that has caused me stress, and he has lied to me every which way about it. I was told I would never be able to show my face in public. I was told I was going to lose all of my friends if I made the wrong move. Those, and others, were lies, straight from the depths.

He has caused nightmares in the past few years. Twice, I woke up shaken to the core, so afraid, but aware that I was being bullied by someone who has already been beaten. I found peace and solace in that.

Tuesday, he lied to me during Bible Study. The nerve of that weasel. We started the video, Believing God, and as Beth Moore started to speak about how she believed in miracles because she was one, my mind was overtaken with this horrible thought: “You are not a miracle. You don’t know what it’s like to be lost. You’re overchurched and don’t know anything about the world. You have no credibility with anyone. You are worthless in ministry, so give it up. You don’t matter because you don’t know.”

I knew instantly I was being attacked, Praise Be to God who loves me so much, and headed straight to the bathroom where I repeated the five truths I’ve learned by heart. 1. God is who He says He is. 2. God can do what He says He can do. 3. I am who He says I am. 4. I can do all things through Christ. 5. God’s Word is alive and active in me. I believe God!

God’s presence took over, and I knew my Father won my battle for me.  Praise Him.

Why on earth am I writing about this? I know it seems pretty personal, but I feel it should be public. I feel like he should be called out. Celebrities are taking huge stands on bullying, why don’t Christians speak out against the one who creates the lies that causes the insecurity that creates the bullies? Call him on it! Call on Jesus, who has won the battle already and walk in victory!

I really wish there was something stronger than an exclamation mark, that’s how passionate I feel right now. God has been more than gracious to me to allow me to know when I’m being attacked. What about the people who are being lied to every minute, but don’t realize it? Worse, they don’t know what they can do about it? As followers of Jesus, we have to recognize it and use the power that is living in us, and put on our armor and fight back. It’s the only way to protect our minds from the lies. I’ve been lied to about my worth, my looks, my credibility, my friends, my husband’s love, my ability as a parent, and so much more. Thankfully, I have people that will pray for me in the moment. I have an artillery of scripture I can speak on the situation (and oh, how I crave for so much more to use! Please Lord, give me the time and attention to memorize!)

I can’t say I’ve ever lived in the pit, due to the grace of God and parents who brought so much Jesus in my home, it was like they nailed a cover over the pit and refused to let me in! But I know that the pit is a huge reality, and that the lies from the enemy are what will get me there in a minute, should I believe them.

I beg you. Know the Word. Recognize the lies. Talk to someone if you think you’re being attacked and are not sure if that’s what it is. If Jesus lives in you, he has already won! You are the victor! The enemy has been defeated. Oh, what a great day that will be, to see him destroyed forever.

Eph. 6: 10-17: Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Praise be to God, our Father! Not only do you fight for us, but then you give us a way to fight with you!


January 27, 2011 at 3:31 am 3 comments


I straightened my hair last Wednesday. I felt like using my nice flat iron. Otherwise, it sits in my closet and collects dust.

Unfortunately, I have a dusty closet.

It takes me about an hour to get it done. I have to dry my hair then iron it piece by piece. I have a hard time finding an hour to devote to my hair, so I don’t do this often. I like my curly hair, so I’m pretty much satisfied with my wash and wear routine.

But every now and then, a girl needs to make a change.

Here’s what I look like with the kinks ironed out:

Anyway, I changed the ‘do, and went through my Wednesday with little to no comment at all from the various peanut galleries I encountered.

Then I went to church.

I am probably exaggerating, but I went home that night amazed that a change of hairdo could evoke that many opinions. Here’s a sample of what I was told throughout the evening:

“I like it better poofy!”
“I saw you come in, and had no idea who you were!”
“I wondered who that woman was sitting by your husband. But I didn’t want to ask, didn’t want to start the rumors.”
“I understand that sometimes you need to spice things up.”
“There is something different about you…not sure what it is.”

The comments lasted through the rest of the week. I went to my son’s basketball game and various church people asked me why I changed my hair and then changed it back.

The answer is simple. I bathe. I washed my hair and the curls came back. Really, it’s not earth shattering revelation.

So, what I’ve learned from this hair-flattening experience is this: Everyone has an opinion. Really, we all do. What’s funny to me is how people are so quick and even anxious to share their opinion about someone else’s appearance. That’s why we watch reality shows and beauty pageants, isn’t it?

The crux of the matter, though, is that most people have opinions about things that matter as well. We just don’t talk about those things. For some reason, we consider it less offensive to share an opinion about someone’s appearance, and more offensive to share our opinion about who we think God is. That’s odd to me. Shouldn’t it be the other way around? I mean, even if you don’t know the girl on television, you probably shouldn’t make fun of what she looks like. But if you know, and have experienced the perfect love, grace and power of God in your life, it’s really okay to share that. It’s actually commanded.

We have opinions. God gave us the capacity to form them. Why would He do that if He didn’t want us to tell others what we think about Him?

Acts 4:20 “for we are unable to stop speaking about what we have seen and heard.” Peter and John were talking about Jesus here. There is no mention in my translation about hair whatsoever.



January 25, 2011 at 11:18 pm Leave a comment

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